8 Moves to Make When You Want to Give Up
Posted by Editor in Chief, Pick The Brain
Taking the easy road is nice for a while, but for talented, motivated people it isn’t enough. To find satisfaction you’ll need to set ambitious goals, solve challenging problems, and develop strengths you may not know you have.
Although the hard road is more fulfilling, it isn’t all champagne and victory laps. There will be times when you feel beaten and depressed — times when quitting looks like the best option. There is no formula for dealing with hard times, but these 8 steps will help you understand your predicament and determine the best course of action.
1. Take a Break
One reason we get down ourselves is fatigue. When you’re tired everything is harder. Working your tail off for extended periods will wear you down if you aren’t careful. You’ll also get bored. Fatigue and boredom combine to cause burnout — one of the biggest reasons people quit. When faced with burnout, the best thing to do is take a break. Cut yourself off completely. Do absolutely nothing for a day or two. What’s the worst that could happen? By allowing yourself to recover you’ll be more productive in the long run.
2. Step Back
Sometimes we get so absorbed in our own sphere that we develop a distorted picture of reality. When you feel like giving up, there’s a good chance that a) things aren’t nearly as bad as they seem, and b) there’s a simple solution that you’re overlooking. When things seem bleak, distance yourself from the situation to gain an accurate perspective. What would someone without any emotional involvement do? Asking this question will help you make optimal decisions.
3. Do Your Research
The only constant in the universe is change, but when you’re plugging away with your head down it’s easy not to notice. People often make decisions based on outdated assumptions made months, or even years earlier. To develop a course of action, you’ll need to know where you stand. Stop to evaluate your position.
■What do you have?
■What do you want?
■How has the market adjusted?
■What opportunities still exist?
■What new opportunities have arisen?
By taking stock of the current situation, you’ll discover if your urge to quit is a passing whim or the correct decision.
4. Consult an Expert
When your knowledge base is insufficient you should seek an expert opinion. This doesn’t mean you have to make contact with a world class expert, anyone who knows more than you will be able to help. Think of friends, family, and business associates. Have any of them been in your position before? The web can also be a great resource, just be careful who you trust. Check out relevant forums or email a reputable blogger. I’m consistently impressed with the effort people expend to help total strangers.
5. Re-evaluate Your Strategy
Once you’re well informed, apply that knowledge to revamping your strategy. If you feel like giving up, you might be doing something wrong. This is the time to pour over your efforts and determine what works.
■What actions have lead to the greatest benefit?
■What mistakes have been made?
■What can be improved?
By answering these questions you’ll fine tune your strategy. The urge to give up is a blessing when it leads to analysis and constructive adjustments.
6. Change Course
Knowing what’s wrong and how you can fix it is a relief. Unlike an invisible monster hovering over you, an exposed problem can be directly assaulted. Once you’ve determined a change needs to be made, implement it full force. Don’t hesitate or dwell on past mistakes. Trust your own judgment and deal with new issues as they arise.
7. Push Through the Dip
In some cases you might feel like giving up even though you’re doing all the right things. This is called “the dip” — the plateau that separates the average from the best in the world. Knowing what to do when you hit the dip is so important, Seth Godin wrote a book on it. In you’ve hit the dip and you can honestly say that going forward is the best decision, lower your shoulder and plow ahead until you reach the other side. It might not be pleasant but the rewards are tremendous. If you make it.
8. Quit
We don’t have thoughts and emotions for nothing. Sometimes quitting is the best decision. Maybe you didn’t know what you were getting into. Maybe your priorities have changed. Maybe you’d be better doing something else. If you know deep down that quitting is the right move, do it. Don’t hesitate because of previously invested effort. That’s a sunk cost. If you ignore your better judgment and continue you’ll waste more time and energy.
Thursday, March 07, 2013
Friday, February 22, 2013
Top 10 Ways to Be Successful in Both Business and Life
by Gayle E. Santana
Why do some people succeed, while others fail to reach their goals? Here's one business owner's observations about what successful people do that others don't.
I have been a business owner for about a minute. In fact, that would probably be quite generous if you compared me to the business moguls out here or anywhere for that matter. But in spite of that fact, I probably know a lot about business, more than I realize and much more than you would expect, if you knew my background. It is my life as a business owner that has finally made sense of all the data and observations that I have gathered over the years. I spent 20 years of my life working for others, most unknown, some infamous.
Because my jobs were in an executive assistant capacity for the past 20 years I, like all assistants, get to see the workings of the company almost like a fly on the wall. We get to see the inner workings of the people we work for. We get to hear the opposing view from others who work for the company, both those who are close to the boss and those far removed.
I don't know about other assistants, but for me it's like watching a horror movie where you know what's behind the door but the person opening the door has no idea. And you are in the audience screaming don't do it! But who is going to listen to you? So you just see and feel certain behaviors and actions and you file them away like you are gathering data for future analysis. Well I am now in that future and this is my analysis. Life and business are not all that different. Some people would like you to think the rules of the game are different in business, but they really are not. They like to keep the mystery about it, the smoke and mirrors going. But in my own experience, observation of others and readings about the lives of countless others, this is what I believe it takes to be successful in both life and business. It is what I constantly strive to achieve for myself. And in the style of David Letterman, we'll begin with number 10!
10. Letting your gut-instincts keep you safe.
This is more than street-smarts. I believe that gut instinct is not just some strange source but 1- the spiritual essence of us and our connection with the source of life, but also 2- it is a lifetime of observation and learning from experience. I surely have experienced life and I have spent my life observing people. I have the ability to peer into the insides of people. My mother could do it. She would make these statements about people she barely knew and she'd hit the nail on the head about their very essence. I too have this ability. The thing is it's not always something you can verbalize but your gut tells you some things right off the bat. This is a very useful thing in the business world and I believe we all have this ability but not everyone taps into it. Being able to read people doesn't mean that you immediately run or become best friends, it means that you proceed with caution filing away the info you've got on hand right now. If there is something queer about a business proposition, keep this up front as you examine it. You know in your gut when something's right and when something's not right.
9. A lifetime of self-examination -
I cannot stress this enough. We are a work in progress. You will make mistakes, your attitude will change and you will grow. But if you don't take the time to examine yourself and your attitudes along the way, you run the risk of becoming stagnant and brittle. And brittle is a good candidate for crumbling dust. Examine your relationships with people, your business practices, not just your finances. In the end, it is your relationship with people that makes you successful in both life and business. If you find yourself having the same issues arise, it's time for some self-examination. What are you doing to contribute to this issue? What can you do to create a change?
8. Open mindedness to new ways of thinking.
How many times have we seen people, throughout history, hold on to what they believe is the ONLY way to think, to find the world moving on without them? It was generally thought the automobile would never catch on; after all, weren't bicycles and trains more than enough? It doesn't mean you have to change your way of thinking or embrace it, just examine it, educate yourself about it and recognize that it may be here to stay.
7. Open mindedness to new technology--
This relates to number 8 but in a business capacity, it is even more important. A pencil and paper may be your preferred method of working on finances, but you had better know a few things about technology or you and your pencil will be left behind. Sure you can hire others who know, but what you don't know CAN hurt you. Read! You can learn so much about anything by reading. And if you were tech savvy you would know the internet is the greatest addition to the library in regard to learning about everything!
6. Being streetwise and book-smart -
There is nothing more important than having a reasonable balance of both. Naivety can cost you and not being educated to the level you need to function well in your chosen environment can cost you as well. Don't leave your street-smarts at the door in business environments but temper it with real knowledge as well.
5. Education and constant re-education --
I am not talking about college degrees here. Though they are a great start, you must continue to educate yourself. Take part in seminars, read everything, surf the net. Even when you think you've got it, press on.
4. A willingness to give back -
First, take care of yourself. Put yourself in a position to give back. I've had the privilege to hear so many people speak about their ideas for new businesses. The first thing they say is that they want to help people and that they want to give away what they've got.
Andrew Morrison, from Small Business Camp (http://www.smallbusinesscamp.com) and believer that questions are more powerful than answers (see his book "21 Questions that Will Build Your Business in 90 Days") always asks the question, "Where's the money?" because if you can't support yourself, if you have to close your doors because you are bankrupt, how can you realistically help others?
Sure there are exceptions to this, but most people have been able to give back and help others because they helped themselves. When you've helped yourself, GIVE BACK! I've seen many people become selfish and bitter in this regard. "I had to do it for myself! Nobody helped me!" They begin to dole out help in a miserly manner, looking for something in return including gratitude. They also give with suspicion. They suspect that those they give to will use it to steal something from them. If you watch closely, here is where they will begin their descent.
If you feel like you got where you are on your own, look carefully I say, because you did NOT get to where you are without help. And much of it was given unselfishly and without restraint. Give generously and from the heart and don't look back! (CAUTION: DON'T ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE DRAINED DRY BY THOSE WHO LIKE TO PLAY UPON THIS NOTION EITHER)
3. Love and caring for yourself -
Here is a simple analogy. When you board a plane you are treated to a demonstration of what to do in case the oxygen masks drop from above. The first instruction is to put your mask on first. This is especially important because if you don't take care of your need first, you will not be able to help others and that includes your children, your spouse or anyone else. How does this relate to business? Create the situation that best helps you first. Put yourself in a position of power or at least close to the ear of power. Do a great job, first for you. Excel for you. Then assist others, speak up for others, do for others.
2. How you treat people --
I believe in this. I don't think you really have to right to abuse people. Some people think that certain groups of people are okay to abuse. I am not speaking from a standpoint of race here either. These people think that it's okay to abuse "the help" i.e. countless waiters and waitresses, assistants, maids, children. They also think it's okay to abuse what they deem "fat people" or people they believe are "ugly". They believe it's okay to treat "telemarketers" with disrespect when these are just people doing a job (I'm not talking about rude or abusive telemarketers either!). I believe that the golden rule is truth that still stands, because truth will always stand. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, or your daughter or son, or spouse, etc. I urge you to read "How to Win Friends and Influence People", by Dale Carnegie, over and over again. Study the lives of the charismatic. Success was written in their everyday dealings with people. Not on a superficial level but on a deeper connecting level.
1. Commitment to the journey -
Here is what I believe is the number one key to success for an entrepreneur. Are you committed? What I am trying to say is that in all of my observations, and from my own experience, I find that the journey is always the same. It's a long road of self examination and improvement, skill examination and education. It's making judgment calls about people, things and situations. You continually correct the "course" until you are headed in the right direction. To trust your gut, to keep the faith, to make it through tough times, takes practice. The question is can you stick it out? Do you quit because the money is low? Do you quit because you can't find the right people? When do you say it's over?
Commitment to the journey. It is the key to success. Because you will always see things that make you want to run. But you have to put your faith on the table. You really have to stand against all odds. It takes courage. And when you do this, you will succeed. As Goethe put it:
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness concerning all acts of initiative (and creation). There is one elemental truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans--- that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves all. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issue from the decision, Raising in one's favor all manner of incidents and meetings and material assistance which no one could have dreamed would come his or her way.
Whatever you can do or dream, you can begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Begin it now.
- Goethe (1749-1832), German poet and dramatist
I am committed to the journey. Let's see if Goethe and I are right.
Gayle Santana is the owner of PVS Network and the PVS Network Virtual Call Center (http://www.glmediagroups.com/pvsnetwork/news.htm) and is committed to the PVS mission . "Our mission is a call to service. We are called to provide business owners with the support they need to achieve success. Whether it's making calls or assisting them with creating a more efficient operation, our success is tied to the success of others and there lies our passion."
Why do some people succeed, while others fail to reach their goals? Here's one business owner's observations about what successful people do that others don't.
I have been a business owner for about a minute. In fact, that would probably be quite generous if you compared me to the business moguls out here or anywhere for that matter. But in spite of that fact, I probably know a lot about business, more than I realize and much more than you would expect, if you knew my background. It is my life as a business owner that has finally made sense of all the data and observations that I have gathered over the years. I spent 20 years of my life working for others, most unknown, some infamous.
Because my jobs were in an executive assistant capacity for the past 20 years I, like all assistants, get to see the workings of the company almost like a fly on the wall. We get to see the inner workings of the people we work for. We get to hear the opposing view from others who work for the company, both those who are close to the boss and those far removed.
I don't know about other assistants, but for me it's like watching a horror movie where you know what's behind the door but the person opening the door has no idea. And you are in the audience screaming don't do it! But who is going to listen to you? So you just see and feel certain behaviors and actions and you file them away like you are gathering data for future analysis. Well I am now in that future and this is my analysis. Life and business are not all that different. Some people would like you to think the rules of the game are different in business, but they really are not. They like to keep the mystery about it, the smoke and mirrors going. But in my own experience, observation of others and readings about the lives of countless others, this is what I believe it takes to be successful in both life and business. It is what I constantly strive to achieve for myself. And in the style of David Letterman, we'll begin with number 10!
10. Letting your gut-instincts keep you safe.
This is more than street-smarts. I believe that gut instinct is not just some strange source but 1- the spiritual essence of us and our connection with the source of life, but also 2- it is a lifetime of observation and learning from experience. I surely have experienced life and I have spent my life observing people. I have the ability to peer into the insides of people. My mother could do it. She would make these statements about people she barely knew and she'd hit the nail on the head about their very essence. I too have this ability. The thing is it's not always something you can verbalize but your gut tells you some things right off the bat. This is a very useful thing in the business world and I believe we all have this ability but not everyone taps into it. Being able to read people doesn't mean that you immediately run or become best friends, it means that you proceed with caution filing away the info you've got on hand right now. If there is something queer about a business proposition, keep this up front as you examine it. You know in your gut when something's right and when something's not right.
9. A lifetime of self-examination -
I cannot stress this enough. We are a work in progress. You will make mistakes, your attitude will change and you will grow. But if you don't take the time to examine yourself and your attitudes along the way, you run the risk of becoming stagnant and brittle. And brittle is a good candidate for crumbling dust. Examine your relationships with people, your business practices, not just your finances. In the end, it is your relationship with people that makes you successful in both life and business. If you find yourself having the same issues arise, it's time for some self-examination. What are you doing to contribute to this issue? What can you do to create a change?
8. Open mindedness to new ways of thinking.
How many times have we seen people, throughout history, hold on to what they believe is the ONLY way to think, to find the world moving on without them? It was generally thought the automobile would never catch on; after all, weren't bicycles and trains more than enough? It doesn't mean you have to change your way of thinking or embrace it, just examine it, educate yourself about it and recognize that it may be here to stay.
7. Open mindedness to new technology--
This relates to number 8 but in a business capacity, it is even more important. A pencil and paper may be your preferred method of working on finances, but you had better know a few things about technology or you and your pencil will be left behind. Sure you can hire others who know, but what you don't know CAN hurt you. Read! You can learn so much about anything by reading. And if you were tech savvy you would know the internet is the greatest addition to the library in regard to learning about everything!
6. Being streetwise and book-smart -
There is nothing more important than having a reasonable balance of both. Naivety can cost you and not being educated to the level you need to function well in your chosen environment can cost you as well. Don't leave your street-smarts at the door in business environments but temper it with real knowledge as well.
5. Education and constant re-education --
I am not talking about college degrees here. Though they are a great start, you must continue to educate yourself. Take part in seminars, read everything, surf the net. Even when you think you've got it, press on.
4. A willingness to give back -
First, take care of yourself. Put yourself in a position to give back. I've had the privilege to hear so many people speak about their ideas for new businesses. The first thing they say is that they want to help people and that they want to give away what they've got.
Andrew Morrison, from Small Business Camp (http://www.smallbusinesscamp.com) and believer that questions are more powerful than answers (see his book "21 Questions that Will Build Your Business in 90 Days") always asks the question, "Where's the money?" because if you can't support yourself, if you have to close your doors because you are bankrupt, how can you realistically help others?
Sure there are exceptions to this, but most people have been able to give back and help others because they helped themselves. When you've helped yourself, GIVE BACK! I've seen many people become selfish and bitter in this regard. "I had to do it for myself! Nobody helped me!" They begin to dole out help in a miserly manner, looking for something in return including gratitude. They also give with suspicion. They suspect that those they give to will use it to steal something from them. If you watch closely, here is where they will begin their descent.
If you feel like you got where you are on your own, look carefully I say, because you did NOT get to where you are without help. And much of it was given unselfishly and without restraint. Give generously and from the heart and don't look back! (CAUTION: DON'T ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE DRAINED DRY BY THOSE WHO LIKE TO PLAY UPON THIS NOTION EITHER)
3. Love and caring for yourself -
Here is a simple analogy. When you board a plane you are treated to a demonstration of what to do in case the oxygen masks drop from above. The first instruction is to put your mask on first. This is especially important because if you don't take care of your need first, you will not be able to help others and that includes your children, your spouse or anyone else. How does this relate to business? Create the situation that best helps you first. Put yourself in a position of power or at least close to the ear of power. Do a great job, first for you. Excel for you. Then assist others, speak up for others, do for others.
2. How you treat people --
I believe in this. I don't think you really have to right to abuse people. Some people think that certain groups of people are okay to abuse. I am not speaking from a standpoint of race here either. These people think that it's okay to abuse "the help" i.e. countless waiters and waitresses, assistants, maids, children. They also think it's okay to abuse what they deem "fat people" or people they believe are "ugly". They believe it's okay to treat "telemarketers" with disrespect when these are just people doing a job (I'm not talking about rude or abusive telemarketers either!). I believe that the golden rule is truth that still stands, because truth will always stand. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, or your daughter or son, or spouse, etc. I urge you to read "How to Win Friends and Influence People", by Dale Carnegie, over and over again. Study the lives of the charismatic. Success was written in their everyday dealings with people. Not on a superficial level but on a deeper connecting level.
1. Commitment to the journey -
Here is what I believe is the number one key to success for an entrepreneur. Are you committed? What I am trying to say is that in all of my observations, and from my own experience, I find that the journey is always the same. It's a long road of self examination and improvement, skill examination and education. It's making judgment calls about people, things and situations. You continually correct the "course" until you are headed in the right direction. To trust your gut, to keep the faith, to make it through tough times, takes practice. The question is can you stick it out? Do you quit because the money is low? Do you quit because you can't find the right people? When do you say it's over?
Commitment to the journey. It is the key to success. Because you will always see things that make you want to run. But you have to put your faith on the table. You really have to stand against all odds. It takes courage. And when you do this, you will succeed. As Goethe put it:
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness concerning all acts of initiative (and creation). There is one elemental truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans--- that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves all. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issue from the decision, Raising in one's favor all manner of incidents and meetings and material assistance which no one could have dreamed would come his or her way.
Whatever you can do or dream, you can begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.
Begin it now.
- Goethe (1749-1832), German poet and dramatist
I am committed to the journey. Let's see if Goethe and I are right.
Gayle Santana is the owner of PVS Network and the PVS Network Virtual Call Center (http://www.glmediagroups.com/pvsnetwork/news.htm) and is committed to the PVS mission . "Our mission is a call to service. We are called to provide business owners with the support they need to achieve success. Whether it's making calls or assisting them with creating a more efficient operation, our success is tied to the success of others and there lies our passion."
Tuesday, February 19, 2013
The Top 10 Things Successful People Do To Reach Their Dreams
www.elitedaily.com
Success is something we all aspire towards. Unfortunately, it doesn't come easy and it won't just happen over night.
It takes hard work, time and perseverance. To be successful, one must mirror the common practices of people who are already successful and follow in their footsteps.
Amassing great wealth is no walk in the park, but having case studies and understanding what others have done can help set you on the right path to reach your goals and dreams.
Here is a brief list of the 10 things that these ambitious and unstoppable people did to see success.
The 10 things successful people live by before they make it:
10. No excuses
We all have several voices in our minds that speak to us. There is the voice that tells us to work hard, never quit and focus on the task that is presented to us. It also pushes us to finish the task before we move on to the next and aspire towards our utmost potential. On the contrary, we unfortunately also have a voice that tells us to take a break, procrastinate, be lazy or stalk girls on Facebook.
No ones life is perfect and we are all faced with variables and injustice from time to time. Instead of sitting there feeling sorry for yourself, letting it get to you and giving you reason to make excuses, push forward and put it behind yourself. Use it as motivation and use it as an opportunity to learn and grow.
Listen to your excuses. Understand why you have them. Then figure out how you can use them for good. Excuses will only slow you down, making it imperative to find a way to erase them from your mind.
9. It's not just about materialism
Materialistic items are surely a part of your motivation, but they should be a tiny part of the motivation within you. The truly successful in life always get there because they created change in the lives of others, not just their own.
Find other motivators besides materialistic objects that will drive you-more fundamental motivations instead of just objects that can just come and go. It will be something within you that will trigger your ambition. It could be an ex girlfriend, someone telling you that you will fail or even revenge.
8. Early mornings and late nights.
The early bird gets the worm, as the saying goes. Successful people didn't sleep in late or take days off. They worked extremely hard and passionately every single day until they reached their goals.
Your personal life and social life will be toned down, but your focus will completely be on your goals with early mornings and late nights.
When you are striving for success there is no such a thing as days off. Until your goal is complete everything else in life should come second. You should be up as early as possible and not go to bed until you can't physically keep your eyes open anymore. There is no substitute for hard work.
Abraham Lincoln said, "Things may come to those who wait... but only the things left by those who hustle." If you want to be successful, you're going to have to out hustle everyone else.
7. The greatest commodity.
The greatest commodity we all have is time, but energy is just as important as time. The more energy we have within us, the easier it is to focus, and a higher quality of work is the result. Your output equals your input.
One of Richard Branson's 'keys to success' is staying in great physical shape. So would raised energy levels be the greatest benefit to working out? It may be.
Keeping physically fit gives us greater blood-flow to our brain, enhanced alertness and improved focus. Make training a routine part of your life and increase your chances at success - in every meaning of the word.
6. Principles.
Principles and morals are two things that are in-existent in our modern day society. It has almost become a thing of the past.
Take a look at Winston Churchill. The man had principles like no other. The difference between him and the general populace is that he stuck to his principles at all costs. If you want to be successful, you will emulate Churchill and have faith in your ambitions. Live your life by what you believe, don't just change because it's the cool thing to do.
One of Apple's principles is to bring change to the world through technology, and they do it with every product they release.
Identify what principles you have that guide your life through tough times, and when things couldn't be any better. They shouldn't change no matter what.
5. Wavering and unbreakable faith.
We cannot stress how important it is to have unbreakable faith instilled within yourself and in your mind. Many people question if their dream is going to come true. The strong have unbreakable faith and believe what they are doing is right.
Even if you have moments that are doubtful, take your unbreakable faith to defeat your self-doubt.
Have your moments of doubt. You're human. Just don't let that doubt eat you up. Instead, let it motivate you to prove your optimism right.
4. A reason.
You would be surprised how insecure many successful people are. What has motivated many of them to succeed is having something to prove to others to help alleviate their insecurities.
From these insecurities emerges a desire to elevate their status and create change that was so strong that failure simply was never an option. If you want to be successful you have to have that powerful driving force behind you to stay motivated.
Understand why. You have that reason to work when others sleep, to sacrifice a safe life for a risky one with no ceiling. Find it by asking why, and not stopping until you hit your core, emotional reason for wanting to change your status, or the status of others.
The reason is completely up to you and no one can judge you from it. One of our reasons is a teacher a very long time ago telling us that we would never amount to anything. I remind myself that quote every morning when I wake up.
3. They persevered when others didn't.
As we have stressed in many other articles before, perseverance is one of the biggest tools to success. Success can come tomorrow or 5 years from now. You truly never know.
Quitting should never be an option or even a thought. The only time you should stop is when you ultimately reach your goal and then create a new mission and a new apex.
We don't know when our breakthrough will come. So don't guarantee your failure by quitting. You can adapt, change, and evolve, but never, never, never quit.
2. Great people relentlessly studied their craft.
If you know the system then you will understand how to beat it. Our society downgrades how important it is to know the craft, but we here understand how important this is. Take hours of your time and study to perfection. Be humble and know the craft better than anyone.
When people think of Mike Tyson, they think of an animal, but what we fail to see is the student. No one studied boxing like Tyson did. Tyson watched more film than anyone in the history of the sport.
He was a student first and a fighter second.
Being a drone and simply going through the motions is no way to achieve greatness. Assuming success is something you want, you have to study your craft. Learn it inside and out. Build a wealth of knowledge. It'll help you create great, inspiring, and unique work.
1. Risk.
As the saying goes, with no risk comes no reward at all. Those who have achieved the most success have laid it all on the line for what they passionately believed in. It truly takes guts to risk it all, but eventually that is what you are going to have to do. If you believe in what you are doing there should be no fear in risking your life on it.
Do you really want to sit there in regret with a bunch of "what ifs" in your mind?
"The greatest tragedy in life is wasted talent"- A Bronx Tale
Risk if you truly want to see the reward. Find your dream. Then risk everything to get it. The world is yours you just have to take it.
Thursday, November 29, 2012
Coming Back Home...
“I claim to be a simple
individual liable to err like any other fellow mortal. I own, however, that I
have humility enough to confess my errors and to retrace my steps.” Gandhi
Hi All,
Thanks for your understanding and your patience.
Warm Regards,
Barry
Back home to find the funny kid
whose sense of humor got him through life’s rough and tumble challenges. Back
home to the dreamer who knew that he can and will make his goals come true.
Back home to the kid that always bumped into success at every turn on life's
highway. Back home to the kid that grew up without a Father while living in the
NYC public housing projects and now's the very proud dad of the best son anyone
could ever have.
I want to get back home to the
kid who was passionate, hopeful and fearless. I NEEDED to find my way back home
so I totally walked away from my life and did a "Do Over", a major life
rewind.
I have taken risks that I
normally would not take, I have been more introspective and adventurous than I
have ever been and I made significant sacrifices that I normally would never
make.
I will share my journey, and the lessons learned, with you.
Hopefully by sharing my Successes, Mistakes and Setbacks I could cut 5 -10
years, or more, off your learning curve and it will help me to get "Back Home"Thanks for your understanding and your patience.
Warm Regards,
Barry
Sunday, November 25, 2012
25 Great, Positive, Heartwarming, Make Us Smile Very Short Stories
Monday, September 03, 2012
Turn "Socializing" into "Networking"
Turn "Socializing" into "Networking"
Most professionals know they must network in order to achieve long-term business success. I remember as far back as high school being told by my guidance counselor that I needed to "meet a lot of people and build a network." That was great advice back then and even better advice today.
It's critically important to participate in the public arena and interact with the people who could become your clients, provide you with valuable information or help you further your causes and beliefs.
While they understand the importance of networking, many professionals do a lousy job of it. It's easy to show up at an event, grab a drink, eat some free hors d'oeuvres, say "hi" to a couple people, then go home and pat yourself on the back for being involved in the community.
Unfortunately, that's not networking. It's merely socializing.
There's nothing wrong with socializing. In fact, it's generally a good thing, but it's not efficient. In order to convert socializing into networking, you need to have a three-tiered goal planted in your mind before you even enter the venue where networking will take place.
I call it "goal-based networking," and here's how it works:
Goal #1
"I will get a direct opportunity"
This could be a new client, an invitation to join a prestigious organization, a job offer, a promise to donate money to your pet cause. While Goal #1 is ideal, it unfortunately doesn't happen at most networking events.
Goal #2
"I will get a solid lead on a direct opportunity"
This is almost as good as the first goal, because it moves you closer to what you really want. Goal #2 should happen at the vast majority of networking events you attend. If it doesn't, you're not meeting enough people or not asking the right questions.
Goal #3
"I will meet new people and learn valuable information"
This is the bare-bones minimum goal that you should achieve at every single networking event you attend.
Make a commitment to network more and remember to think about these three goals before walking into your next networking event. Setting these goals consistently over a long period of time will maximize the return from your investments in networking. That means you increase your public profile, connect with the right people and become that person who always seems to know about business happenings long before your colleagues do.
It's critically important to participate in the public arena and interact with the people who could become your clients, provide you with valuable information or help you further your causes and beliefs.
While they understand the importance of networking, many professionals do a lousy job of it. It's easy to show up at an event, grab a drink, eat some free hors d'oeuvres, say "hi" to a couple people, then go home and pat yourself on the back for being involved in the community.
Unfortunately, that's not networking. It's merely socializing.
There's nothing wrong with socializing. In fact, it's generally a good thing, but it's not efficient. In order to convert socializing into networking, you need to have a three-tiered goal planted in your mind before you even enter the venue where networking will take place.
I call it "goal-based networking," and here's how it works:
Goal #1
"I will get a direct opportunity"
This could be a new client, an invitation to join a prestigious organization, a job offer, a promise to donate money to your pet cause. While Goal #1 is ideal, it unfortunately doesn't happen at most networking events.
Goal #2
"I will get a solid lead on a direct opportunity"
This is almost as good as the first goal, because it moves you closer to what you really want. Goal #2 should happen at the vast majority of networking events you attend. If it doesn't, you're not meeting enough people or not asking the right questions.
Goal #3
"I will meet new people and learn valuable information"
This is the bare-bones minimum goal that you should achieve at every single networking event you attend.
Make a commitment to network more and remember to think about these three goals before walking into your next networking event. Setting these goals consistently over a long period of time will maximize the return from your investments in networking. That means you increase your public profile, connect with the right people and become that person who always seems to know about business happenings long before your colleagues do.
About the Author
Jeff Beals is an award-winning author, who helps professionals do more business and have a greater impact on the world through effective sales, marketing and personal branding techniques. As a professional speaker, he delivers energetic and humorous keynote speeches and workshops to audiences worldwide. You can learn more and follow his "Business Motivation Blog" at http://www.JeffBeals.com.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
Top 10 Traits of Highly Successful People -That You Can Learn!
By Philip E. Humbert
We have all read about people who are successful briefly. They win a gold medal, make a fortune, or star in one great movie…and then disappear. Or, there are those like Marilyn Monroe and Howard Hughes who achieve extraordinary success, at the cost of their own lives. These examples do not inspire me!
My focus and fascination is with people who seem to do well in many areas of life, and do it over and over through a lifetime. In entertainment, I think of Paul Newman and Bill Cosby. In business, I think of Ben and Jerry (the ice cream moguls), and a local hardware store owner who is famous for the money he’s give to children’s charities. As a Naval Officer, husband, businessman, politician and now as a mediator and philanthropist on the world stage, Jimmy Carter has had a remarkable life. We all know examples of people who go from one success to another.
These are the people who inspire me! I’ve studied them, and I’ve noticed they have the following traits in common:
They work hard! Yes, they play hard, too! They get up early, they rarely complain, they expect performance from others, but they expect extraordinary performance from themselves. Repeated, high-level success starts with a recognition that hard work pays off.
They are incredibly curious and eager to learn. They study, ask questions and read – constantly! An interesting point, however: While most of them did well in school, the difference is that they apply or take advantage of what they learn. Repeated success is not about memorizing facts, it’s about being able to take information and create, build, or apply it in new and important ways. Successful people want to learn everything about everything!
They network. They know lots of people, and they know lots of different kinds of people. They listen to friends, neighbors, co-workers and bartenders. They don’t have to be "the life of the party", in fact many are quiet, even shy, but they value people and they value relationships. Successful people have a rolodex full of people who value their friendship and return their calls.
They work on themselves and never quit! While the "over-night wonders" become arrogant and quickly disappear, really successful people work on their personality, their leadership skills, management skills, and every other detail of life. When a relationship or business deal goes sour, they assume they can learn from it and they expect to do better next time. Successful people don’t tolerate flaws; they fix them!
They are extraordinarily creative. They go around asking, "Why not?" They see new combinations, new possibilities, new opportunities and challenges where others see problems or limitations. They wake up in the middle of the night yelling, "I’ve got it!" They ask for advice, try things out, consult experts and amateurs, always looking for a better, faster, cheaper solution. Successful people create stuff!
They are self-reliant and take responsibility. Incredibly successful people don’t worry about blame, and they don’t waste time complaining. They make decisions and move on. Sometimes they are criticized for taking this to extremes – Jimmy Carter carried his own briefcase and a President "shouldn’t" do that! Extremely successful people take the initiative and accept the responsibilities of success.
They are usually relaxed and keep their perspective. Even in times of stress or turmoil, highly successful people keep their balance, they know the value of timing, humor, and patience. They rarely panic or make decisions on impulse. Unusually successful people breath easily, ask the right questions, and make sound decisions, even in a crisis.
Extremely successful people live in the present moment. They know that "Now" is the only time they can control. They have a "gift" for looking people in the eye, listening to what is being said, enjoying a meal or fine wine, music or playing with a child. They never seem rushed, and they get a lot done! They take full advantage of each day. Successful people don’t waste time, they use it!
They "look over the horizon" to see the future. They observe trends, notice changes, see shifts, and hear the nuances that others miss. A basketball player wearing Nikes is trivial, the neighbor kid wearing them is interesting, your own teenager demanding them is an investment opportunity! Extremely successful people live in the present, with one eye on the future
Repeatedly successful people respond instantly! When an investment isn’t working out, they sell. When they see an opportunity, they make the call. If an important relationship is cooling down, they take time to renew it. When technology or a new competitor or a change in the economic situation requires an adjustment, they are the first and quickest to respond.
These traits work together in combination, giving repeatedly successful people a huge advantage. Because they are insatiable learners, they can respond wisely to change. Because their personal relationships are strong, they have good advisors, and a reserve of goodwill when things go bad. And finally, none of these traits are genetic! They can be learned! They are free and they are skills you can use. Start now!
By Philip E. Humbert
We have all read about people who are successful briefly. They win a gold medal, make a fortune, or star in one great movie…and then disappear. Or, there are those like Marilyn Monroe and Howard Hughes who achieve extraordinary success, at the cost of their own lives. These examples do not inspire me!
My focus and fascination is with people who seem to do well in many areas of life, and do it over and over through a lifetime. In entertainment, I think of Paul Newman and Bill Cosby. In business, I think of Ben and Jerry (the ice cream moguls), and a local hardware store owner who is famous for the money he’s give to children’s charities. As a Naval Officer, husband, businessman, politician and now as a mediator and philanthropist on the world stage, Jimmy Carter has had a remarkable life. We all know examples of people who go from one success to another.
These are the people who inspire me! I’ve studied them, and I’ve noticed they have the following traits in common:
They work hard! Yes, they play hard, too! They get up early, they rarely complain, they expect performance from others, but they expect extraordinary performance from themselves. Repeated, high-level success starts with a recognition that hard work pays off.
They are incredibly curious and eager to learn. They study, ask questions and read – constantly! An interesting point, however: While most of them did well in school, the difference is that they apply or take advantage of what they learn. Repeated success is not about memorizing facts, it’s about being able to take information and create, build, or apply it in new and important ways. Successful people want to learn everything about everything!
They network. They know lots of people, and they know lots of different kinds of people. They listen to friends, neighbors, co-workers and bartenders. They don’t have to be "the life of the party", in fact many are quiet, even shy, but they value people and they value relationships. Successful people have a rolodex full of people who value their friendship and return their calls.
They work on themselves and never quit! While the "over-night wonders" become arrogant and quickly disappear, really successful people work on their personality, their leadership skills, management skills, and every other detail of life. When a relationship or business deal goes sour, they assume they can learn from it and they expect to do better next time. Successful people don’t tolerate flaws; they fix them!
They are extraordinarily creative. They go around asking, "Why not?" They see new combinations, new possibilities, new opportunities and challenges where others see problems or limitations. They wake up in the middle of the night yelling, "I’ve got it!" They ask for advice, try things out, consult experts and amateurs, always looking for a better, faster, cheaper solution. Successful people create stuff!
They are self-reliant and take responsibility. Incredibly successful people don’t worry about blame, and they don’t waste time complaining. They make decisions and move on. Sometimes they are criticized for taking this to extremes – Jimmy Carter carried his own briefcase and a President "shouldn’t" do that! Extremely successful people take the initiative and accept the responsibilities of success.
They are usually relaxed and keep their perspective. Even in times of stress or turmoil, highly successful people keep their balance, they know the value of timing, humor, and patience. They rarely panic or make decisions on impulse. Unusually successful people breath easily, ask the right questions, and make sound decisions, even in a crisis.
Extremely successful people live in the present moment. They know that "Now" is the only time they can control. They have a "gift" for looking people in the eye, listening to what is being said, enjoying a meal or fine wine, music or playing with a child. They never seem rushed, and they get a lot done! They take full advantage of each day. Successful people don’t waste time, they use it!
They "look over the horizon" to see the future. They observe trends, notice changes, see shifts, and hear the nuances that others miss. A basketball player wearing Nikes is trivial, the neighbor kid wearing them is interesting, your own teenager demanding them is an investment opportunity! Extremely successful people live in the present, with one eye on the future
Repeatedly successful people respond instantly! When an investment isn’t working out, they sell. When they see an opportunity, they make the call. If an important relationship is cooling down, they take time to renew it. When technology or a new competitor or a change in the economic situation requires an adjustment, they are the first and quickest to respond.
These traits work together in combination, giving repeatedly successful people a huge advantage. Because they are insatiable learners, they can respond wisely to change. Because their personal relationships are strong, they have good advisors, and a reserve of goodwill when things go bad. And finally, none of these traits are genetic! They can be learned! They are free and they are skills you can use. Start now!
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
The One Ingredient That Enables You To Have 365 Chances Every Year To Make Your Dreams Come True
By Barry Sarner
What's the Ingredient? It's Positive Expectancy and we all have it in our power to make it an integral part of our life. What is positive expectancy?
Positive Expectancy is all about "New Tomorrows" and the beautiful notion of "Starting Fresh" and "Starting over every day, any day".
The simple reality of it all is that the world wakes up and the world goes to sleep. What happens in between for the most part plays out based on what choices we make all day. The choices could be as simple as deciding to sit on a bus instead of standing.
I had an accident months ago and I played it over and over again in my mind. I remember thinking to myself that if I had left the store when I planned and not gone back for something it would have been someone else and not me in the accident.
The point is that you make decisions and choices all day long. Some work out in your favor and some don't and I say, so what. Why not decide to have an attitude that you're a good person and that you have the right to expect good things to happen to you and for you? It's a simple choice. It's also a numbers game.
The more you believe that you're worthy of good or great personal events the better chance you have of it coming true. Even if it happens initially only 20% of the time that's better than zero times and zero times it will be if your expectations are low or nonexistent.
The exciting reality here is that the more you use, strengthen and adjust your positive expectancy attitude the more your success percentage will go up. Expecting good things to happen every day for you is a choice that every human being should be making. I promise you there's no law, secular or religious, that says that you cannot expect great things to happen to you.
Your past does not determine what your life will be or could be. A firm decision to choose positive expectancy will start you on a journey of success and happiness. Patience and persistence will be the vehicles that get you to the finish line. All you have to realize and then commit to is the fact that you have the right to expect great things and that you'll have great things happen to you.
You have the chance to start your life over 365 days per year. Every year you have 365 chances to make your Dreams come true. Expect good things every day. Every night and every morning tell yourself that although the day may have challenging and stressful situations you still will have good things happen to you. Just say it out loud often and with feeling.
Will this be the day you go for it? Will you go for that dream that keeps you up at night? Will you go for the dream that makes your heart pump faster and your mind spin out of control?
Not today? That's ok. Don't ever give up.You have 364 more chances this year to make it happen.
I wish for you to have a lifetime of very powerful tomorrows.
What's the Ingredient? It's Positive Expectancy and we all have it in our power to make it an integral part of our life. What is positive expectancy?
Positive Expectancy is all about "New Tomorrows" and the beautiful notion of "Starting Fresh" and "Starting over every day, any day".
The simple reality of it all is that the world wakes up and the world goes to sleep. What happens in between for the most part plays out based on what choices we make all day. The choices could be as simple as deciding to sit on a bus instead of standing.
I had an accident months ago and I played it over and over again in my mind. I remember thinking to myself that if I had left the store when I planned and not gone back for something it would have been someone else and not me in the accident.
The point is that you make decisions and choices all day long. Some work out in your favor and some don't and I say, so what. Why not decide to have an attitude that you're a good person and that you have the right to expect good things to happen to you and for you? It's a simple choice. It's also a numbers game.
The more you believe that you're worthy of good or great personal events the better chance you have of it coming true. Even if it happens initially only 20% of the time that's better than zero times and zero times it will be if your expectations are low or nonexistent.
The exciting reality here is that the more you use, strengthen and adjust your positive expectancy attitude the more your success percentage will go up. Expecting good things to happen every day for you is a choice that every human being should be making. I promise you there's no law, secular or religious, that says that you cannot expect great things to happen to you.
Your past does not determine what your life will be or could be. A firm decision to choose positive expectancy will start you on a journey of success and happiness. Patience and persistence will be the vehicles that get you to the finish line. All you have to realize and then commit to is the fact that you have the right to expect great things and that you'll have great things happen to you.
You have the chance to start your life over 365 days per year. Every year you have 365 chances to make your Dreams come true. Expect good things every day. Every night and every morning tell yourself that although the day may have challenging and stressful situations you still will have good things happen to you. Just say it out loud often and with feeling.
Will this be the day you go for it? Will you go for that dream that keeps you up at night? Will you go for the dream that makes your heart pump faster and your mind spin out of control?
Not today? That's ok. Don't ever give up.You have 364 more chances this year to make it happen.
I wish for you to have a lifetime of very powerful tomorrows.
Sunday, January 01, 2012
CHANGE IS GOOD . . . . FOR THE NEW YEAR
BY DR. SHARON M. MELNICK
There is one "master" resolution. Without it all your other resolutions cannot be carried out. The one ability you wantto resolve to strengthen is Self Trust.
Self-trust is relying upon your inner resources (i.e.emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual) to achievedesired success and fulfillment. It enables you to staysteady and expand what you CAN control in this fast-changingworld, rather than try in futility to change marketconditions or other people.
Self trust is about believing in yourself , i.e., whetheryour efforts are worthwhile and will help you progresstowards the happiness and results you seek.
Self trust is about your ability to manage yourself, sothat when it comes time to do the behavior you've said ishealthy or constructive for you, you can get yourself to doit.
Self trust is about viewing yourself as worth treatingwell, i.e., that you are deserving of having the resultsyou are pursuing. This comes from seeing yourself as otherssee you, not through filters of self judgment.
You judge yourself because you think you will only beloveable to others or secure in your career if you live upto an ideal of perfection. Therefore you always compareyourself to this ideal, setting yourself up to fall shortand beat yourself up.
Everyone, no matter who you are, has felt crunched in thepast year or so. Some of us are feeling overwhelmed by thestresses, others of us are feeling resilient, knowing theywill land on their feet no matter what. Resilient peopleare energized and taking action everyday to createopportunities and keep their relationships strong.
Self trust is a key factor that determines how you will navigate through turbulent times.
How do you rate yourself on a 1-10 scale of Self Trust?What is your Resolution for how Self Trusting you want tobe in 2010 and the upcoming decade?
Self trust is a learned skill. Go to my blogwww.sharonmelnick.com/site/resolution for some questions toaid your yearly review and an exercise to build selftrust.
Leave me your comments about this blog post and let me know how you build self trust.--Dr. Sharon M. Melnick(O) 212.842.4638sharon@sharonmelnick.com Follow me on Twitter: DrSharonMelnick
There is one "master" resolution. Without it all your other resolutions cannot be carried out. The one ability you wantto resolve to strengthen is Self Trust.
Self-trust is relying upon your inner resources (i.e.emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual) to achievedesired success and fulfillment. It enables you to staysteady and expand what you CAN control in this fast-changingworld, rather than try in futility to change marketconditions or other people.
Self trust is about believing in yourself , i.e., whetheryour efforts are worthwhile and will help you progresstowards the happiness and results you seek.
Self trust is about your ability to manage yourself, sothat when it comes time to do the behavior you've said ishealthy or constructive for you, you can get yourself to doit.
Self trust is about viewing yourself as worth treatingwell, i.e., that you are deserving of having the resultsyou are pursuing. This comes from seeing yourself as otherssee you, not through filters of self judgment.
You judge yourself because you think you will only beloveable to others or secure in your career if you live upto an ideal of perfection. Therefore you always compareyourself to this ideal, setting yourself up to fall shortand beat yourself up.
Everyone, no matter who you are, has felt crunched in thepast year or so. Some of us are feeling overwhelmed by thestresses, others of us are feeling resilient, knowing theywill land on their feet no matter what. Resilient peopleare energized and taking action everyday to createopportunities and keep their relationships strong.
Self trust is a key factor that determines how you will navigate through turbulent times.
How do you rate yourself on a 1-10 scale of Self Trust?What is your Resolution for how Self Trusting you want tobe in 2010 and the upcoming decade?
Self trust is a learned skill. Go to my blogwww.sharonmelnick.com/site/resolution for some questions toaid your yearly review and an exercise to build selftrust.
Leave me your comments about this blog post and let me know how you build self trust.--Dr. Sharon M. Melnick(O) 212.842.4638sharon@sharonmelnick.com Follow me on Twitter: DrSharonMelnick
WISHING YOU ALL A HAPPY, HEALTHY, PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR
"Whatever you do, or dream you can, begin it.Boldness has genius and power and magic in it."~Goethe~
To me the New Year is all about Positive Expectancy. It's all about "Tomorrows" and the beautiful notion of "Starting Fresh" and "Starting over every day, any day"
I want to wish you all a very Happy, Healthy, Prosperous New year.
You have the chance to start your life over 365 days per year. Every year you have 365 chances to make your Dreams come true.
It's January 1. Will this be the day you go for it? Go for that dream that keeps you up at night. The dream that makes your heart pump faster and your mind spin out of control.
Not today?That's ok. Don't ever give up... You have 364 more chances.
Have a powerful New Year.
To me the New Year is all about Positive Expectancy. It's all about "Tomorrows" and the beautiful notion of "Starting Fresh" and "Starting over every day, any day"
I want to wish you all a very Happy, Healthy, Prosperous New year.
You have the chance to start your life over 365 days per year. Every year you have 365 chances to make your Dreams come true.
It's January 1. Will this be the day you go for it? Go for that dream that keeps you up at night. The dream that makes your heart pump faster and your mind spin out of control.
Not today?That's ok. Don't ever give up... You have 364 more chances.
Have a powerful New Year.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)