CHANGE IS GOOD.....DON'T GO IT ALONE

5 Keys to Recognize Friendship

By Carla McNeil

What is a friend? I believe a friend gives advantage, not takes advantage.
A friend can be many things: a partner, because two people together, focused on the same goal/direction, are better than one; someone who helps you, not beats you when you are down; someone who is there in hard times to help you get through your challenging situations; someone who protects you.

A friend doesn't harp or gossip on things! Who wants to be reminded again and again of something one did wrong. We are all human, we all err. Friends assist us with the situation, assist us to grow and then move on. And then there is no gossiping about it to others!
In my journey of personal development the biggest challenge has been "friends". I never realized there could be so many different levels of friendship, I figured if you were my friend, then you were my friend in everything. I was wrong and learned many lessons the hard way.
A few years ago I took a 6 month contract away from my home base. While I was away I found out that two of my "best" friends had gotten together and had a bash-Carla fest. Then they both had to tell on each other to me!! I was devastated - that, however, was my most effective "training" event about friendship.

From that experience, I learned about different levels of friendship and that not everyone is going to be my best friend. The price for that lesson was pretty high. It cost me two friends, one that had been my friend for over 10 years. It was a huge part of my lesson on "Letting Go"!!

I have found there are 5 ways to recognize True Friendship.
1) Friends will comfort and support you when trouble or disaster shows up in your life
2) Friends are devoted to you, are loyal and willing to change their plans just for you.
3) Friends love you no matter the situation or what you have done. Through thick and thin they are still there. We have all done something "stupid" in our life but we do not want to be judged on that one action for the rest of our lives.
"A friend is a person who knows all about you, and still likes you." Elbert Hubbard
4) Friends will speak constructively - even when it hurts. We all know that we have behaviors, habits or actions that could use a little improvement. After all we are human beings and to "err is human". It is the true friend who will let you know about those challenges in a constructive way because they want what is best for you. Remember friends give advantage. If done in a constructive way without malice or cruel intent, it will provide us the opportunity to become better people and improve our own life.
5) Friends will help you. Have you ever asked for something and had everyone run away? People who you thought were your friends? Helping is giving advantage. I know when I help my friends that it will be returned in kind. Maybe not from the same friend I assisted but I know it will come from somewhere in my life.
Last week I had a friend tell me that something I had assisted them with months ago is currently having a positive impact in her life. She thanked me on a day where that positive feedback was just what I needed! I have found that it is always best to be the first to offer that assistance. No sitting around waiting for our friends to help us!! Who wants to have that kind of friend?

Remember all five of these keys apply both ways. Are you being all of these to your friends as well? We all need to evaluate our friendships; some that we may have thought were good friends could turn out to be acquaintances.
I used to think I had some real friends in my "job". Turns out in many cases I was wrong. When I answered these five questions about some of my friends I was surprised that they were not as close as I had originally thought.
The real deciding factor for me was "am I that kind of friend for them?" When I was honest with myself and answered "No" it was a very eye-opening experience. We must always remember what we expect from our friends they have the right to expect from us in return.

"A real friend is one who walks in, when the rest of the world walks out. Never above you. Never below you. Always beside you " Walter Winchell

Treat your friends as you do your pictures, and place them in their best light." Winston Churchill's mother, Jennie.


Send me an email at Carla@RetireWithCarla.com - let me know what you liked best about this article. Is there a way that I can assist you in your personal development? It would be my pleasure to assist where I can!
Hear me live on the Terrific Tuesday Teleclass1-218-486-7200 Bridge 549706Every Tuesday at 5:30 Pacific
http://www.RetireWithCarla.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Carla_McNeil

This article has been viewed 114 time(s).Article Submitted On: August 19, 2008
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CHANGE IS GOOD.....MAKE IT HAPPEN

Go Hard in Pursuit of Your Life's Vision!

By Dr. Mario Barrett

The other day I was having a conversation with a friend of mine. In our conversation, I realized that she lived her life without any sense of urgency or passion, leading her to an unfulfilled life. She has been simply going through the motions when it came to major areas in her life such as managing her career, maintaining relationships with people, and maintaining her health. In our conversation, I asked her why she chose to live her life in this manner. Her response was simple, "I don't know. "
Now, we often use the phrase "I don't know" when we don't want to take the time out to analyze or discuss the issue at hand. However, she like many of us should ask ourselves the following questions-How is my life showing up for me? Do I love my life, or simply tolerate it? Am I actively acquiring what I want out of it, or simply accepting whatever I can get? I would argue that many of us are simply accepting whatever we can get. Take a look around you, do you believe that your neighbors, friends, or co-workers are actively engaged in a life they love? Are you?
I am a firm believer in the notion that the life that we live on earth is a one time deal. You don't have a second chance to do it again. If you agree with this line of thinking and are living an unfilled life, then you need to change your thinking and begin behaving in a manner that is consistent with the fact that you do not have eternity on earth to achieve a life that you love. Therefore, you must take on a sense of urgency, passion, and vigor in how you pursue this ideal life. The mindset that you must incorporate is based on the belief that the actions necessary for accomplishing your ideal life must begin now. This mindset followed by action will enable you to get out of whatever rut you are presently living in and begin taking the necessary steps to create a life that you love. However, unlike my friend, it is important that you go hard!
Use your sense of urgency and passion to support your efforts with vigor. Instead of allowing one day to simply carryover into the next, make every day count. Make your actions count, which will make your life meaningful and your time on this earth a true experience. I challenge you today to go hard in pursuit of your life's vision.


Dr. Barrett has an earned PhD in applied management and decision sciences, with a specialization in leadership and organizational change. He also holds a MS in organizational leadership and a BS in organizational management. In addition to these degrees, Dr. Barrett has completed several executive certificates focusing on various areas of management and leadership development.
Dr. Barrett is proud of his academic accomplishments, as they are the product of his long and sometimes difficult journey out of poverty. Along his journey, Dr. Barrett served honorably in the U.S. Air Force, participating in several vital overseas operations in the Middle East and Europe. He has also taught organizational leadership courses at the graduate degree level at Mercy College. This desire to develop leadership whether it be in myself or others is what drives Dr. Barrett. Dr. Barrett currently lives in NYC, where he runs The Barrett Center for Leadership Development, LLC http://www.TheBarrettCenter.com and produces The Barrett Leadership Blog http://www.TheBarrettCenter.blogspot.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr._Mario_Barrett

This article has been viewed 54 time(s).Article Submitted On: August 02, 2008
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CHANGE IS GOOD......THINK ABOUT IT!!!!

Think And Grow Rich - Tips On How To Change Your Thinking To Success Thinking

By Bonnie Holscher


With the growing number of people who want to make changes in their lives, it's no wonder people question that they can think themselves to riches. It is true however that you can change your overall thinking to become more successful and richer. How you think about a lot of areas of your life can determine your amount of success. Here are a few tips on things to be aware of that have an effect on your success personally and financially.
How you feel about people who have more money or success than you change effect your motivation to improve your life. The people you already spend time with probably have about the same income as you do.

One way to increase your success is to find a new friend or two that are in a higher financial arena and learn some of the things they did to get to the levels they are at. When you put some of these things into place you will be pleasantly surprised how your personal and financial situations begin to change. It does not happen overnight but it does happen.

Another way you can insure that you grow and succeed is to continue learning from other sources. There are books, CD's and many types of seminars available to help you grow your know and in turn grow your success. Make a point of seeking new learning avenues and watch how things change in your success level.

One additional tip and one that many overlook is to not give up. And don't quit before you really get started. So many times people get their feet wet and decide that they do not want to take another step. But these are the same people that wonder why they stay right where they are at and continue to be unhappy and unfulfilled in their desires for life.
So the fact of the matter is you can think yourself into a richer future. Your just need to put to work the things that really make the difference in your everyday life. You can change your personal and financial success forever.


I invite you to learn more about the secrets to changing your thinking to "Think and Grow Rich" thinking by visiting http://www.yourattitudeandyou.com and find out what you might be missing for your success.
From Bonnie Holscher - Take Action Coach teaching others how to take steps forward on their success road.
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Bonnie_Holscher

This article has been viewed 77 time(s).Article Submitted On: February 09, 2008
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CHANGE IS GOOD ........YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE !!!!!

You Can Move Mountains

By Dr. Mario Barrett

When I was as a child, I never thought that I would have the ability to lead a change effort, yet here I am imploring humanity to lead itself from the inside-out.

Back then, I didn't believe that I had the power to shift people's thinking about poverty, crime, violence, and most of all, how they viewed themselves. I never thought I had the skills, persona, or proper upbringing to lead others. Like much of humanity, I believed that a new leader would emerge and take charge. Therefore, I waited for our generation's Dr. King, John F. Kennedy, Nelson Mandela, and Ghandi. Well, I waited and waited, while the problems around the world (such as poverty, hunger, racism, and genocide) that called for leadership were not getting the attention they deserved. You see, the problem with me, like with most of us is that we do not see ourselves as leaders, relegating us to waiting for the "one" who we think is. The problem is that while we wait, often times, the world's problems get worse.

So, who is the "one" you ask?

The "one" is that individual that we perceive to be a leader, who will step in and correct all of the world's ills and save us.

The "one" is that individual that we believe is larger than life and can move mountains with his/her charisma, intelligence, oratory skill, or cunning.

The "one" is that individual that can draw large groups of followers to support him/her in causes of concern to all of us.

The "one" is that individual that gets us into action, when we can't get into action on our own.

Crazy enough, it was not until recently that I realized that I am the "one," I mean, we all are. And while, we may not have all or any of the attributes that I just described, we all have a passion to take action on causes that we hold dear to our hearts. In my case, my passion for self-empowerment has led to my development of the attributes necessary for successfully leading others to addressing their causes.

We are all the "one," because we cannot continue to wait for the next coming of King or Ghandi.
We are all the "one," because the world's ills will not go away on their own. We are all the "one," because if not us, then who?
The truth is that the responsibility to solve the world's ills resides in all of us.

We all have the ability to lead others to take action(s) on causes that we hold dear. We all are versions of King and Ghandi, as they were versions of us. Get it through your head, we all are leaders and have the the ability to transform the world into a place that works for all of us.
With all of this in mind, when will you start moving mountains and embrace yourself as the "one"?


Dr. Barrett has an earned PhD in applied management and decision sciences, with a specialization in leadership and organizational change. He also holds a MS in organizational leadership and a BS in organizational management. In addition to these degrees, Dr. Barrett has completed several executive certificates focusing on various areas of management and leadership development.
Dr. Barrett is proud of his academic accomplishments, as they are the product of his long and sometimes difficult journey out of poverty. Along his journey, Dr. Barrett served honorably in the U.S. Air Force, participating in several vital overseas operations in the Middle East and Europe. He has also taught organizational leadership courses at the graduate degree level at Mercy College. This desire to develop leadership whether it be in myself or others is what drives Dr. Barrett. Dr. Barrett currently lives in NYC, where he runs The Barrett Center for Leadership Development, LLC ( http://www.TheBarrettCenter.com ) and produces The Barrett Leadership Blog ( http://www.TheBarrettCenter.blogspot.com )
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Dr._Mario_Barrett

This article has been viewed 34 time(s).Article Submitted On: August 02, 2008
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